Wanted — Sleep Bandits

My sleep was severely impaired last night. Largely because of the sleep bandits that I live with:

America’s Most Wanted

Name: Phoebe B.

DOB: 5/15/96

Height: 9″

Weight: 7lbs

Aliases: Feebs, Feeble, The Pooh Bear, Feeble Boo

Wanted for: Midnight marauding, cavorting with imaginary friends, breaking and entering bedroom closets, several attempts to suffocate the person who kindly feeds her by sleeping on her head.

Name: Bailey B.

DOB: 4/??/05

Height: 11″

Weight: 16 lbs.

Aliases: Bailey-Boy, Senor Bay, The Bay, Bailey-Bad-Ass

Wanted for: Disturbing the peace (by decided to play with belled toys at 3:00 am), begging, howling

These criminals must be caught before they strike again!!!